Catching up..

Geez Jairemie just made the best Banana shake ever! It was really making me forget what I was doing. Its like a pina colada without the pinia..lol I know I have not written in a long time so I thought I'd get started again! One problem..My laptop is acting up. When I type its like the delete button is being pushed so my thoughts erase as I watch and can do nothing. Very frustrating but Im in a writing mood so not even possesed laptops will not stop me!

Its probably been a month or so since I last wrote so I should have alot to say. I will keep it as simple as possible. I am probably the happiest I have ever been. I feel very loved. I have recently met some amazing people. They have come into my life at the right moment. I can see this next year that some great things will happen.

Jairemie has a release date for his album..December 12..He's promoting this release by having a 12 days of Xmas tour. Beginning Dec 1st he will be kickin off a 12 venue performance. That is alot of singing. When I have gone to his shows its as almost as the next day you are drained! It is such an adrenalin rush and the next day its the hard crash. 12 days..wow Im excited but at the sametime Im lil nervous.

I have alot goin on in my personal life. Crazy how you can go from having such intense totally wrong relationships, to some of the best you ever had! Time and more time will see this through. Definetly on the right path.

Ill be headed to Germany in less than a week. Im at the last stretch! Scared but excited. Nervous but Cool!

The kids are all doing very well in school. My babies are straight A's!! They are all so unique and gifted in there very own way. Jairemie which is self evedent..His music speaks volumes..no pun intended. DJ is doing great, he is working on gathering parts for a bike he is building..He is getting so freakin tall! I think he is like 6'2 now!! He aspires to Graduate from West Point and join the service! To me this is so admirable! So this would mean Id have a superstar performing artist and an Officer...Hell yea!

My baby girls are turning into lil women..o my goodness! They both can fit into my clothes and we tend to share..What the hell!! They are like my lil besties!! I miss them when they were babies but they are amazing now still! They never cease to amaze me!

Ill be in Germany for almost a month..I will prolly have minimal contact with the people I love in the states and around the world but just know u all are a part of me and you are loved!

Guess I need to make myself busy now and clean this house up..

My how time flies..

Ive had to step away from my blog for a lil bit due to the fact that I have been moving. We are finally out of our old place but to be honest I am pritty happy. It was a nice place with its spacious rooms and ofcourse my amazing closet but all in all it is better for some other family. We still have tons to do with all the unpacking and organizing. I am hoping to do as much as possible before my trip to San Jose. It should be a great trip. Ive been so very busy that Ive been neglecting my friends and my gramz. Sometimes it gets so hard to balance it all but I will make a valiant effort. I posted a comment for the family to see regarding my sweet grama. I hope no one takes offense by thinking I am telling them what to do but I do have some insight. My grama is getting older and has seemed to have fallin into a lil bit of a depression from being alone at her place. I mean I realize we are all busy but taking time to touch base with her will help her to keep going. She has had alot of Dr. visits and this last one really concerns me. She has to keep getting blood transfusions and is tired alot of the time. She will be 85 this November so she is not getting any younger. The Dr has told her that the report on her heart indicated that she has had heart damage..a silent heart attack. This scares me because she is alone at her place and if she would have had a more severe attack we would not have known about it to help her. I will try my very best to spend more time with her because every second with her will be a memory I will have with me the rest of my life time. She is feeling very sensitive and feels neglected by some of the family and this saddens me. I should spend more time with her but I too get caught up with my own stuff I am afraid I have not been a good granddaughter. I would love for everyone to make an effort but you cant force people to do anything so thats why I put it out there. I love my grama so much. I love everything about her and I have been blessed to be close as I am with her.


Ive been busy with Jairemie tryin to jump start his career. He has released his first single "Cry Diamonds" and will be releasing his first album with Hourglass records some time this month. Hes musoc is great and the most amazing part about it is that he created every single bit of it on his own! I am so very proud of his genius like creation. He will be successful.

On this journey I have met some great people. I have also meet some not so great people. This industry is full of many different types of personalities. Lucky for me I have many so we all get along...lol

I will be heading to CA Friday and I am very excited. My Papi's 50th b-day party will be sooo much fun! It is planned as a surprise so he has no idea Tedi, Jairemie, Boogie, Julia and I will be coming. We plan on visiting Aunite Tedi and JT. We are so lucky that Ted, Jair and I all drive!!

I love my kids!

I gotta say..I love my babies..no matter what they love me...they are here for me..they are mine! They are all unique but we all fit together perfect. I think to myself that I dont think I could have made it thru without them. I was so alone but they were there. Life would be pointless without them.

My Personality Test..This is Me...

How does your personality affect your love life?


With the strong degree of self-confidence that you possess, it’s no surprise that you get along well with most people. Indeed, it’s self-confidence that allows people to feel comfortable interacting with others without feeling insecure and vulnerable. For this reason, you shouldn’t have much difficulty in romance, at least not initially. Your social skills will likely help relieve any anxiety your romantic partners might have on those first few dates. However, over time, the high standards that you have for yourself could potentially frustrate your partner.

Given how much you value family life, you probably get along best with people who share your values and beliefs. In fact, it’s likely that you maintain close connections with members of your immediate and distant family. For this reason, you would probably be most satisfied in a romantic relationship with someone who also values domestic life.

Being in a relationship with someone who enjoys going out to parties and staying-up late at night might be fun, at least initially; yet it’s likely that you will find this tiring over time. Thus, it might be easier and more satisfying for you to develop a long-lasting relationship with a person who also enjoys spending time at home and desires starting a family. On first dates, perhaps you might suggest to your partner that the two of you spend a quiet night having dinner at one of your respective homes instead of going out to a restaurant or club.

As someone who is more relaxed than most people, you likely get along with most people quite well. Chances are that your friends and colleagues perceive you as lively, fun to be with, and good-humored. When it comes to romance, you’ll likely be attracted to most people. However, your free-spirited nature might make being in a relationship with a person that is more rigid than you difficult because you might perceive the person as being too uptight and controlling.

Your openness probably makes it easy for you to respect and appreciate people that are different from you. However, when it comes to romantic relationships, your openness might make it difficult for you to tolerate people that cannot appreciate diversity as much as you. Therefore, you may be happiest in serious relationships with people that share your open-mindedness. But, your openness might occasionally cause a certain degree of dependency on your end because you may be so open that you easily adopt the preferences and habits of your partners and gradually relinquish things that make you so unique.

Self-Confidence

As someone with high self-confidence, you feel quite comfortable interacting with other people. Indeed, you find the company of others very stimulating and enjoy meeting new people. Your relaxed demeanor in groups makes people around you comfortable too. Perhaps because you feel comfortable talking about yourself, others tend to enjoy being around you and perceive you as socially competent.

The confidence that helps you feel comfortable talking to people also spills into your own personal beliefs about yourself. Although you have several strengths, it’s likely that you also acknowledge and accept your weaknesses. But unlike some people, you take full responsibility for your actions—you rarely regret things you’ve done in the past and are not embarrassed easily.

Perhaps the defining feature that sets you apart from most people is the exceptionally high standards that you set for yourself. Your competence in social gatherings as well as at work should provide ample evidence for this. With these characteristics, it’s very likely that people come to you for advice and generally think of you as someone with leader-like qualities.


Family Orientation

As someone who is oriented to familial matters, you value the company of family-members and domestic life. If you have children already, you enjoy spending time with them very much and work hard to be a good parent. If you don’t have children, you very much desire having children in the future. And your preference for cooking and entertaining guests at home will likely ease the transition into parenthood.

You take pride in maintaining and cultivating a healthy family and work hard to achieve this. This natural tendency is easily illustrated by your preference for doing things around the house as opposed to going out to clubs and restaurants.

What really sets you apart from people that are low in family orientation is that you know how to manage your frustrations and work well on your own. This means that you are well-equipped to manage a family without letting all the work that is involved wear you down. However, as someone with strong family values, all the work that is involved in maintaining a tidy home and well-stocked kitchen might occasionally make it difficult for you to finish everything that you need to do.


Self-Control

The self-control personality dimension captures the way in which a person regulates and directs him or herself. Being low in self-control can be both good and bad. Occasionally people may be compelled to follow their intuitions and give in to their temptations, and your degree of self-control makes this likely to happen more often than not. This can be good in circumstances where being relaxed and open are important. However, in situations where it is necessary to be focused and careful, you might find that you do or say things that may be inappropriate.

As someone who exerts little control over your actions, you may find that you commit social blunders that might offend other people and get yourself in trouble. For example, if you’re given responsibility to work on a project that requires close attention to detail, you may be likely to overlook important details because you have difficulty staying focused. Consequently, you might feel more comfortable delegating such tasks to other people who are more detail oriented. Being able to recognize such characteristics in yourself and having more detail-oriented people do such tasks could be an effective way to manage your own stress level.

Low self-control may diminish your effectiveness at work. Acting too relaxed can make it difficult for you to focus on projects that require organized sequences of steps or stages. Thus, your ability to accomplish may be inconsistent. Indeed, it’s possible that you might be criticized periodically for being unreliable or unable to “stay within the lines.” Nonetheless, you may still experience many short-lived pleasures and never be thought of as boring.


Openness

As someone high in openness, you have a strong appreciation for beauty, both in art and nature. Indeed, it’s likely that you are easily absorbed in music and art, as well as natural phenomena. Another aspect of your openness is your emotional insight; that is, you probably have good access to and awareness of your own emotions.

Another aspect of the openness dimension is the tendency to think about abstract concepts and ideas. This thinking style may take the form of artistic and metaphorical use of language, and/or music composition or performance. Thus, it is likely that, either in your work or spare time, you enjoy activities that get your “creative juices” flowing.

Your tendency to be open-minded can have advantages and disadvantages. For instance, when there are no clear rules about how to approach a particular problem, your openness makes it easier for you to identify new ways to solve problems that might not be very obvious to people that are not as open as you are. In contrast, you may be bored easily in situations that lack high amounts of intellectual stimulation. In such cases, you might have difficulty excelling on projects that do not provide much stimulation or require much creative thinking.


Easygoingness

Easygoingness refers to one's ability to relax. Based on your score, you appear to “take things as they come” and enjoy having a good time. However, being high in easygoingness also has the potential to produce stress in a number of ways. For example, you may find it difficult to complete tasks thoroughly and efficiently. In this way, being high in easygoingness cannot only make your life difficult, but also the lives of the people around you. Another potential problem with being too high in easygoingness is that it can provide you with gratification in the short-term, but in the long-term provide undesirable consequences.

High easygoingness, even when not seriously destructive, may also diminish your effectiveness at work, for example. You may find it aversive and difficult to put in all the effort that may sometimes be needed to effectively accomplish certain tasks. For this reason, your colleagues might view you as forgetful and unfocused.

Sitting back and listening...

I believe I am the happiest I have ever been in my life. Even though I always believed that without a soul mate next to me I was incomplete, I know that was a dependant emotion and not a reality. Now that I have been able to cut loose ends and see those that have hurt me out of my life, I am better. I feel so good. Everyday gets better. I have always been an intelligent human being and a very loving one as well. I have allowed people to come into my life that were probaly ment to pass me by but they saw my love as weakness..my heart has never been one to look away from those that are already hurting. I am proud to say that I have been able to walk away from a couple situations that were disfunctional and emotionally draining without going into an incredible depression. I realize I can not be happy with myself by taking on anothers emotional baggage..I refuse to allow myself to be used and mistreated.

I love the peace I get from listening to my music. It takes me to places that you really only see in your thoughts. I swear there is a song for every situation, every person, every thought, every heartache, every love..everything.

Creative Juice..

I just had a great idea for a web site! I can't reveal it yet cause it is that good! I can't wait to get started. I have found that I love blogging it gets my mind juice flowing!

Warmest day of the year...

We went to the second day of the Sumner Festival. Let me say it this way..it was so lame! We tried to do promo before the show and the people there looked at us as if we were crazy. Maybe cause we do look different but it was so weird. It was a really quiet kind of Festival. Its def different from other venues. It was still all in all fun. Anytime we are out there and Jairemie can do his thing, its a good day. We def will be working on stage performance and have decided to invite dancers to audition to do back-up. It will bring a different vibe and will enhance the stage presence. Watch: So You Think You Can Dance fifth season will begin on Thursday, November 13 at New York City's Mark Morris Dance Center. What about America's Best Dance Group..premieres Aug 9th. They are so awsome!


Mom and Gram came along, they are the sweetest women! I just love being around them. Im glad they were there. Its so nice to be able to be surrounded by lots of support.Boogie and Jazzy and Julia came as well!

Wow time really flies..when you are sleeping!

My power went off super early this morning, around 7am. The last thing I remember was putting my comp down to sleep. I woke up to a phone call from my mama. She and my garama were taking a break from cleaning and called to see if I was gonna be coming over. I THOUGHT it was 1021am but she informed me it was 140pm!!! What the heck. Ok, I did go to bed at 7am but still! Now I have less than an hour to go get all dolled up to go to Jairemie's second day of Sumner Festival Performances. Today he will be doing a total of 5 songs in one set. Mom and Gram have decided to go.

Jair critiqued yesterdays footage and he sees the changes in his performance that needs to be tackled. It's a gloomy day but I love these days. I had just about had enough of the 90+ weather! Until later...

What a day...

Right now I'm watching Kat Williams and it's 230am! I am LMAO! I'm feeling happy. Today was a day I was afraid would come...but I prayed it would come fast because my baby brother is finally settled in his new apartment. Im so excited for him. I was always so afraid for him. Yeah maybe, cause he grew up with a mom, a grandma and 3 sisters, I was fearfull that one day he would have to be on his own. Now he is. He is a student at the Art Institute of Seattle and is 19. I love him if you couldn't already tell! He was depending on me to make sure the move to Seattle was successful. My mom ran all over the place with him getting him ready. Making sure he had what he needed. I know she must really be feeling the same as I am. You gotta understand, I prayed to God for a brother and after having two of the most incredible sisters, I finally got my brother. I'll right later about my beautiful sisters.

So anyhow, we rented the U-HAUL and I was afraid to drive it in Seattle. I almost wanted to hyperventilate. I got up in the morning and I probably should have hurried to get the move going but I was just anxious. We got the u-haul and loaded and moved out. Jairemie had to follow behind cause it was gonna be a oneway u-haul trip. Andrew and I talked the whole trip. It was so nice. We laughed like we always do. Oh and he is a Michael Jackson fan like I am!! We got to his really nice apartment and I finally met a couple, no really they are bf and gf, of his friends. They are the sweetest and I am happy he has great friends. Madison and Jessica, they are my brothers friends and they are great!!

We were trying to hurry cause Jaire was due to perform at the Sumner Festival, 1hr 15min from where we were. I just know realized when we tried to see why we were so late, that I didnt even include the walk thru and getting keys. We did it though. I did it too. I'm proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone, even if I really didn't have a choice. When you are without the one person who did all those thing for you, you are forced to figure it out. I do miss it but I can do without. Jairemie and I dropped the u-haul and then headed towards Tacoma. By this time we were running way behind. We got to the Festival 2hrs late. They love him so much that they still let him go on. I just love watching him perform and being his Manager. He ended up playing twice at different areas of the Festival for a total of 6 songs. He's cool. We stopped off at my mamas cause ofcourse I had to tell her all about it and show her pics. I can't wait to be closer to her. I know my experiance there will be a true growing process for me. She takes care of us so well. She really loves us. Personally I think its a great financial move too. In this economy I want to make sure and insure I have a sweet savings account..I'm getting closer to retirement then most people would think. I'll sacrifice now to reap the benefits later. But I already see how nice it will be. Plus when Nina and Rio come I'll be able to be around them all the time for about 6 months until they go back to Germany.

We finally made it home but guess what my nite was not over. Tiarra makes plans to stay at Alexyas. So I had to take her there. Mind you it's like 11pm when we left. I then stayed and hung out with the mama..my new friend. I havent had a serious female relationship since Gina. So you know you take things easy when it comes to who you decide to be close too. I left at 130am!! Tiarra loved the girl time. She is a pre-teen so this time in her life is very very important. OK I jus got nervous!! Now I find myself here at 320am. My day started at 800am.

What a day...

Long Day..

Well, I found that link. I worked on my myspace and pritty much stayed online the entire day. Im still going through withdrawls due to the separation anxiety I'm having with my Blackberry! My house is a disaster with boxes and has no sense of organization! I'm working on getting more pics on here..Nite Nite

I Was Pritty Excited Today...

I was checking out http://www.isenseeturnsouthern.blogspot.com/ and I somehow came across a link that took me to a great Latin Women Only Myspace. Problem is I ended up going link to link to link that I have lost it! I look with those key words and I simply get site advertising our butts and boobs. I swear the internet is great.

I'm still gonna fight this fight dangit! What a great way to jump back into my culture! I watched a video of yoga in like honduran or something. It wasn't a familiar dialect but understandable.

I got out of bed this morning with all the rest still fast asleep. I figured I do my usual. I got a few things that will be breaking up my days soon. We are in move mode so everything is everywhere but this time we have an excuse!